Hello!

[wellinghall]

I'm feeling cut-off ... no email, no Facebook, no access to anyone else's LJ ... and I'm going to be late home tonight because of a physio appointment! So please, make a comment - say hello, give me a wave, tell me a joke, tell me something to distract me, offer to mow the lawn - anything!

Comments

Part 2.

[gurthaew.livejournal.com]

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'
'My God!' said my wife, 'who would think a person could go on
celebrating that long?'
And that's when the fight started.

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for my SIN. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home.
I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt.' So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.
She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.
She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have got disability, too.'
And that's when the fight started.

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her
someplace expensive... so, I took her to a petrol station.
And that's when the fight started.

My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming
anniversary.sShe said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds. I bought her some bathroom scales.
And that's when the fight started.

One year, a husband decided to buy his mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift. The next year, he didn't buy her a gift. When she asked him why, he replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!"
And that's how the fight started.

Re: Part 2.

[bunn.livejournal.com]

I'm not offering to mow your lawn. You can come and mow mine if you like. Particularly if you have your own machete.

Re: Part 2.

[wellinghall.livejournal.com]

Our dandelion patch lawn wasn't actually too bad. Unlike the jungle it backs onto.